the life of a cook

I usually just put up all my happy thoughts on this blog.

I wanted to take a moment and be fully honest.

I'm having a tough time right now. I work hard...which means that sometimes I want to play hard. Dec and Jan were not great months for me. They were professionally speaking but, personally, I was getting wasted many nights. Crazy hangovers up until I had to go to work at 2:30, 3 pm the next day. I was paying a lot of money for cabs several times a week. I'm still working on that one. Because I get lonely/need company after work/want to talk about my day with someone after work, and who better to listen to me than my coworkers--ppl who actually understand what I'm going through as well as the demands this industry makes on those who are crazy enough to be a part of it.

I love my job but let's be honest. The guys on the line drive me nuts sometimes. And I've been a miserable bitch at work because of it. I've hit my saturation point of listening to gross, dumb, boys' locker-room humor. Sometimes I wish everyone would just shut the fuck up so I can focus. I'm the only girl on main courses and I'm sandwiched between guys, and sometimes I can't bear it. And my boss had to yell at me about it and give me a talking-to. Because I needed it. Because no matter what, attitude does not belong on the line. Not when you have to be a team player and work well with the people around you. I don't want to be that negative person that drains all the positivity out of the people around them...but I've been that person. I'm trying to turn it around though. Because it makes me miserable, it definitely affects the people around me, and most importantly, it doesn't make doing a difficult job any easier.

I've been having long, horrible, protracted fights with my boyfriend everyday for the past 4 days. Every time I think we have things smoothed over, it begins all over again the next conversation we have with each other.

I haven't showered in over 2 days. (But I will today, promise.)

Because I've been too busy fighting with my boyfriend.

I don't eat enough food. I don't get enough sleep. I don't make enough money, so every attempt to have some quality of life (booze, dinner with friends, hanging coworkers...which sometimes leads to cab rides, retail therapy), results in making me poorer. I went over my daytime minutes by over 500 minutes because I need to talk with my long distance boyfriend during the day because it's harder for me to talk to him after I get off work...and am getting thoroughly charged for it.

I feel like I am barely making ends meet.

But I am trying to cultivate better habits. Because living like this is not sustainable. I've been cooking more meals, drinking less, going to bed earlier, taking less cabs, and trying to be more productive in my free time (aka reading books, journaling, cooking, or just relaxing before I go to work). I need to save more money...so I can indulge when my bf comes to visit me in April, and so I can visit him in India some time in the summer.

Heading for that shower...and then getting ready to work again.

Restaurant month couldn't be over faster. (Yes, my restaurant does it for a month, not just a week.) Oh yea, and if you bought a Groupon, that will be expiring some time in April.

Here's a tip. PLEASE...I implore you, to redeem your Groupon before the last week that it expires. It's hell for us, and quite possibly some of the busiest weeks I've spent at the restaurant. People always ask me when is a good time to come to the restaurant. Here's the answer....NOT on the busiest days of the week...aka Saturdays at 7 pm, major holidays, the week before Groupon expires, any prime times during Restaurant Week. If you go to any restaurant earlier on in the week when it's not dead but not too busy, you will get a much better experience. We'll have the time to take more care with your food. Service will be better. Come during the biggest clusterfuck moments, and I have no guarantees. We try our hardest but there's only so much you can do when you have 20 tickets fluttering on the board, 11 burgers, 4 steaks, along with everything else going up at the same time, limited number of backwaiters and servers, and 20 more tickets coming in. Think about it.

5 Things

1
Stews! Here's the muqueca Jackie and I made together a few weeks back.



Recipe inspiration from: Simply Recipes

2
Reading: Life, on the Line by Grant Achatz and Nick Kokonas



3
Missing this litte guy:



4
Guy crushing on...that Sikh guy from the Wes Anderson movies! hahaha

Waris Ahluwalia



5
Last but not least...



my real crush.

Currently Obsessed With

 1
The Creative Habit by Twyla Tharp. This book is amazing, inspirational, practical, and I bought it because I couldn't stop reaching for it every time I went to the Coop for my weekly cafe stakeout. I recommend it for anyone who is trying it to achieve success in any creative field (painting, dancing, writing, (in my case) cooking, entrepreneurship, or any endeavor which requires the flexing of creative muscles/problem solving). I've fallen into the rut of showing up everyday at work and working hard but not necessarily doing anything valuable in my free time to hone my skills/craft. I'm trying to break out of it.




2
Girl-Crushing: Taylor Tomasi-Hill (seriously, how amazing..)


photo credit: Garance Dore


photo credit: because i'm addicted


photo credit: because I'm addicted



photo credit: the glamourai


photo credit: Jak & Jil


photo credit: Refinery 29


photo credit: Alex Donald's Multiuniverse

Ok, I think I've posted enough pictures of her...feel like Creepy McCreepster!  I love her hair and her style...those bright pops of color and mix of tough and ladylike.

3
My moleskine notebook:



4
Rao's Coffee


5
Reading. 
I'll leave you with this quote:


"The man who does not read has no advantage over the man who cannot read."

                     ~Mark Twain

Listen to Oprah, kids. Read. Read. Read.

Burger Battle @ KO Prime

With very little space, a minimum of equipment and an extremely well prepared, stream-lined operation, Sel de la Terre placed effortlessly at 2nd place last night at the Burger Battle at KO Prime. Other restaurants had fois gras, fancy buns, fried oysters, wagyu beef, aged beef and all kinds of fancy set-ups. We had fresh baked slider buns, 300 sliders of fresh ground beef with nothing but fresh picked thyme whipped into them, spicy aioli with house cured pancetta bits, and cheddar. That's it and that's all folks.

I'm reblogging these images (and text) from someone else's blog..check it out:

(PS, I made that secret sauce!)

(I made like 6 huge containers of it and only needed 2 -.-...and hogged the robot coupe the entire time...3 cooks from L'espalier came up to me several times asking me when I'd be done, and I bitchily said I'd be done when I was done. Big thanks to my boss for not telling me that I didn't need to make gallons and gallons of it haha)

SDLT, please share with me the ingredients to the secret sauce!

Candid of Me at Work

For the curious, this is what I look like on my station. I man the grill.

Photo credit to Ms. Evelyn Hsieh and her iPhone : )

Craving

I've been craving white bean soup with dark greens and some form of smoked pork product




(unfortunately trader joe's only had turkey kielbasa...) it's not that turkey kielbasa tastes bad per se, it's that real kielbasa tastes so much better. and that is all i have to say about all meat facsimiles. even at their best tasting they cannot match the real thing in flavor, texture or satisfaction. the turkey kielbasa tasted fine immediately after scooping myself a bowl of the stew after it was done. however, on my 2nd bowl, i noticed the kielbasa was getting really dried out and flavorless. next time i'll use the real thing...or get some baked ham and cube that up and put it in.

recipe inspirations:

Milk and Mode

Cupcakes and Cashmere

I am obsessed with...

this is a picture i took of a picture of don draper on the packaging of season 3


me wearing red flannel, lying on red flannel


during the superbowl, i ate oreos for the first time since i can't remember the last time i ate oreos. and then i came home and ate my roommate's oreos.